On Tuesday, we CLAWs had our most successful night yet, netting $2,375 for local charity Sexual Assault Resource Agency (SARA). New house band Straight CLAW to the Crotch opened the night with their CLAW theme song and emcee Rosie (that’s me) introduced the audience to the celebrity judges musician Jim Waive and City Councilor Holly Edwards, who relished the faux legitimacy she brought to the proceedings.
This month, we had a new “greenroom” of tattered green rug in the parking lot for the wrasslers to relax and preen in and on with their large entourages. As I looked at all the wrestlers and CLAW production volunteers, I worried that we may outnumber the crowd itself. But that turned out not to be the case as hundreds of eager spectactors poured in just before 8 PM.
The night reached a fever pitch as Bridezilla reached Round 3 and went into labor and the crowd of several hundred went wild screaming “Breathe, breathe, breathe!” It worked. The baby never came and she won her match against formidable former champion The Homewrecker in a tie-break.